The Biggest Fangirl
by Razzmatazzy
Summary: Post-AC, Cloti. Tifa's having a REALLY good day. As such, she decides to pull a little tease on the object of her love. Cloud never really stood a chance. Posted early for Tifa's B-day.


****_(Author's Note: I have no shame. When gunning for me, people tend to have a hard time making me feel embarrassed when I spent a hefty sum acquiring a pair of solid silver Cloudy Wolf earrings - which I wear with pride, I might add -, write Cloti fanfiction daily, and have openly admitted I would bear Cloud's children. But for all that, there's only one person I know of that is a bigger Cloud fangirl than me. Posting this early for Tifa's birthday. For those wondering, _The First Time _will be updated in the first week of May, I swear. Exams have been crushing but are over on the 30th! Sorry to keep you guys waiting! Enjoy!)_

**The Biggest Fangirl**

Some days, when one wakes up, one knows on some deep level that the day is going to be shit. Everything that can be miserable, will be. Coffee will always taste burnt, traffic will be hell, weather will be crap, and everything in general that can possibly conspire to make life hell will single-mindedly bend toward that sadistic goal.

Then there are days that are the complete opposite. One will wake up, stretch, and go bouncing out of bed, smiling. The kind of morning that morning people would have if there were such thing as morning people.

Tifa was having one of the latter kind of days.

When she woke up that morning, she'd tossed off the sheets, went skipping into the kids rooms and roused them, then skipped into Cloud's room and took his pillow. Since his head had been under said pillow, this would have proved an effective means of waking him had he not immediately pulled the sheets over his head. Tifa solved this problem by simply whisking the sheets off the bed entirely.

"Come on, choco-head," she said in a sing-song voice, lightly rapping the back of his head. "Time to get up!" Then she slapped him on the butt playfully and went skipping out of the room. Still carrying the sheets and his pillow.

Cloud sighed and flopped his head on the mattress, then began groping about for his shirt without opening his eyes.

A short time later, there followed the usual routine of making breakfast and ushering the kids off to school, a process full of a sense comforting dull drill and occasionally spiced with the odd panic or two. After seeing them off on their way to school, Tifa dressed and enjoyed a cup of coffee with Cloud.

"What's with you today?" Cloud grumbled. He nursed a steaming cup of coffee in his hand, black as death, sweet as love and hot as hell. The perfect, and only, way to get him running for the day.

She shrugged and grinned. "I dunno. Just one of those good days, you know?" Smiling merrily, she dunked her toast in her coffee and crunched it down.

Cloud just grunted and sipped the precious elixer that got him moving every morning.

"I have to go to the bank today," Tifa said. "You want to come?"

Cloud shook his head. "Nah, I better hold the fort," he said. Ever since the incident with the Remnants several months ago, all the companions had become celebrities overnight. As a result, the inn became incredibly popular and every day a long line of patrons waited patiently on the sidewalk for a table to free up. One of the two heroes had to be there to manage the occasional crisis or three.

More importantly, at least to Tifa, Cloud had become a permanent resident of their home once again and was more than willing to stay there once in a while. Even better, the dark mood that had hung around him the past year had vanished - once more he was the old Cloud again, snarky and quiet, reserved but also easier to laugh, quicker to smile than he once had been. Tifa never tired of walking through the door and up the stairs to find Cloud there, working or doing something the pass the time. She collected jokes from various patrons just to relay them to Cloud later so she could see that rare smile.

"Anything you need me to get while I'm out?" Tifa asked.

"Yeah, some oil. Need to work on Fenrir."

"Mmmkay." Tifa polished off her breakfast, grabbed a leather jacket and dashed for the door, pausing only to ruffle his hair and kiss his cheek. "See you later, handsome!"

"You're not human," he said, and sipped his coffee darkly.

**xXxXx**

Tifa got back just at two o'clock. The inn was quiet. Even though the establishment was incredibly successful because of their hero status, even such lofty titles and the privileges that came with them were subject to the daily eating pattern of the average human. Now, past the lunch rush, not a soul graced the tables of the restaurant.

"I'm home!" Tifa called cheerfully. She carried two full bags of various odds and ends that were needed. Her perky and upbeat mood had not diminished in the slightest over the hours. She took the stairs two at a time and rounded the corner to enter the study.

There she found Cloud, sitting at a table, endeavoring to solve a jigsaw puzzle. He gave a curt hello and cursed - it seemed that two pieces had gotten hopelessly jammed together. The glorious image of a kitten digging up a petunia had been marred, the pieces hopelessly bent. They weren't, she noticed, the only pieces that had suffered similar treatment, leaving Cloud muttering under his breath and giving the kitten on the box a death glare now and then.

He was adorable.

It was at that moment that Tifa got an Idea. It was a very good Idea and she nearly burst out laughing just thinking about it. Without a second's hesitation, she decided to carry it out.

Dumping the bags on the desk, Tifa went over to him and kissed him soundly on the cheek. "Guess what happened today!"

Surprised by her greeting, he did. "What?"

Grinning from ear to ear, she sat down on the desk chair and kicked off her shoes. "I saw the most _amazing_ man today." She wiggled her toes and spun the chair around so that her hair went flying and she laughed.

"Wait, what?" Cloud frowned at her in surprise. "Who? A celebrity or something?"

Tifa tilted her head and looked thoughtful. "Oh, I suppose you could call him that." Then she grinned and said, "He is just the sexiest thing you ever did see, lemme tell you. Mmm! He looks positively edible!"

Laughing at the startled and confused look on Cloud's face, Tifa jumped out of the chair and went skipping down the stairs. In the dining room, she started to put all the chairs up onto the tables, as she always did during closing time - except that closing time was half a day away yet. A distraught Cloud followed her, confusion scrawled on his face. "What?" was all he could say.

"He's like everything a girl could possibly want," Tifa rhapsodized. "Gorgeous, tall, good shoulders, _incredible_ abs." Here she paused in her stacking and winked at him suggestively, the tip of her tongue flicking her lips. "And he's got this perfect, tight little ass that I just wanna-"

"Too Much Information!" Cloud hastily interjected.

Giggling, Tifa whirled to another table, almost dancing across the distance in her positive delight and started stacking the chairs up there. "And he's got the most beautiful eyes ever!" she went on. She sighed and paused a moment, a hand to her chest. "I could just stare at them forever." For a moment, she stared into space with a wistful expression, then sighed rapturously and continued stacking.

"I don't get it..." Cloud said doubtfully. He didn't look as if he truly believed what she was saying, that maybe this was a lead-up to a joke.

Tifa whirled by him to another table, tapping his nose playfully with one finger. "He's perfect! He's got such a cute sense of humor, he's quiet, doesn't brag like other guys, and - oh! - he's just so wonderful, always trying to help others out. He always tries to act like a hardass but it's so obvious he's just gooey inside. What can I say? I'm in love!"

Tifa actually skipped over to the kitchen, opened the door and shouted, "Closing early today guys, full pay! See ya tomorrow!" There came the crash and clamor of activity as the cooks started putting things away. Tifa glided past Cloud and back to the tables, half of which bore chairs on them. "You really only find guys like this in fairy tales, you know? I'm so lucky to have met him."

"What the hell, Tifa?" Cloud stood at the bar, looking incredibly hurt and confused. She felt a pang of guilt. "How the hell did you meet this wonder man?"

Tifa grinned. "Actually, you're not going to believe this. He's from Nibelhiem too!"

"WHAT?" Cloud's eyes widened. "You mean like that... Johnny guy? The blond?"

Tifa couldn't believe her luck, or that he remembered Johnny. He'd actually tricked himself more into believing her ruse than she ever could have! She nodded and skipped over to the door to put up the sign that said, 'Sorry, we're CLOSED.'

"Yes!" she squeaked. "He's got this incredible blond hair; I just want to run my hands through it every time I see him."

Tifa glanced at him flirtatiously across the room. Cloud was leaning against the bar now, looking utterly dejected. Now was the perfect time for the drop. She strode over to him and ran her hands through his hair. His eyes automatically half-closed when she did it, something that always made him relax no matter the circumstances. "He has the most amazing hair ever," she said softly. "I've never seen anyone with spiky hair like him."

A spark of mischievousness lit in Cloud's eyes, accompanied by wary understanding. "That so?"

Tifa giggled. "And he's got this entire badass look going for him, too. Not many could pull it off I think, but he does it very well, and it is just... so... sexy!" She tapped the tip of his nose to punctuate the last three words, making him smirk. "I love how he wears this one earring," she gently tugged on Cloud's ear with the wolf earring, "It just makes him look so butch."

A sheepish smile crept onto Cloud's lips as he fingered his earring. "Really?"

"But you know what I love about him though? It's the way he holds me."

"I'll bet," Cloud said. He put his arms around her, pulling her close, and she sighed happily, lacing her fingers behind his neck.

"And he has this most amazing kiss ever," Tifa added, rolling her eyes in emphasis. "It just makes me melt every time."

Smirking, Cloud kissed her, long and lingering. Tifa shivered with delight. "And what I absolutely love most about him..."

He raised an eyebrow. "I think I know where this is going..."

"Is when he picks me up..." She continued, grinning.

Cloud scooped her off her feet, one arm supporting her back and the other her legs.

"Carries me upstairs..."

Laughing, he carried her up the stairs.

"And retires to bed for a while!" Tifa finished. She laughed as Cloud carried her to the bedroom. Standing just beyond the threshold, Cloud kissed her again, even better than last. During this, Tifa hooked the edge of the door with her foot and gave it a nudge. It slowly began to swing closed.

"So, what was it you were going to say about my ass?"

The door shut with a click.


End file.
